Some more examples of the signs taken from actual instances seen overseas where the actual message of the signs has become victim to English translation.

Japanese instructions on an air conditioner: Cooles & Heates: If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself.

Car rental brochure in Tokyo: When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him  melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor.

Two signs from a Majorcan shop entrance: English well talking. Here speaking American.

A sign on the lion cage at a zoo in the Czech Republic: No smoothen the lion

A Finnish hotel's instructions in case of fire: If you are unable to leave your room, expose yourself in the window.

In a Japanese restaurant (ca. 1950): We reserve the right to serve refuse to anyone.