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  Business Humor

What Engineers Say and What is meant- Part I.......

What Engineers Say and What is meant- Part II

 

The entire concept will have to be abandoned The only guy who understood the thing quit.

 

Modifications are underway to correct certain minor difficulties We threw the whole thing out and are starting from scratch.

 

Essentially complete. Half done.

 

We predict... We hope to God!

 

Drawing release is lagging. Not a single drawing exists.

 

Risk is high, but acceptable. 100 to 1 odds, or with 10 times the budget and 10 times the manpower, we may have a 50/50 chance.

 

Serious, but not insurmountable problems. It will take a miracle. God should be the program manager.

 

Not well defined. Nobody has thought about it.

 

Requires further analysis and management attention. Totally out of control.

 

The project is designed for high availability. Malfunctions will be blamed on the operators mistakes.

 

This project has low maintenance requirements. We wouldn't let the technicians change a light bulb, much less fool around with our baby.

 

The software is being developed without excessive process overhead. The documentation will be written in clear and lucid Chinese.

 

The delivery is scheduled for the last quarter of next year. This leaves us plenty of time to decide who to blame for it being late.

Engineering Revisited........


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